Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Goodbye Dinners, Part II

Tonight, I went out with a gaggle I call "the guys" for a goodbye dinner. Simple, low-key Korean BBQ followed by a quick expedition to Mitsuwa for more giant pocky.

Like every time I have hung out with these guys, there wasn't much planning but we always think of something to do. Or we sit around and rib each other. There is only one other girl who hangs around this group of guys in a purely platonic way (any other girls who have entered this circle have joined with the girlfriend tag and have since exited) is also moving out of San Diego at the end of the month.

I've known these guys since my first year of college and the group has grown and ebbed, drama with other people caused splits in what used to be a large group of friends... and through these events, I've learned a lot about the nature of friendship. Through the friendships and the more-than-friendships (or sometimes, I found, less-than-friendships) associated with the extended group, I've learned a lot about myself as an individual and as part of a relationship.

I've learned that no matter how tough I act, or much they insist that I am just one of the guys, there is more to me than what I present in one setting. I will never really be one of the guys, no matter how girly I'm not, just from the sheer fact that I am a girl. It's given me a lot to reflect about regarding platonic male/female relationships, even though by now I'm well aware that same-sex friendships can have the same levels of easiness and difficulty.

Are any of you gals "one of the guys"? Do you really feel like you are treated like one of the guys, or do you think it's an excuse to not be on their best behavior (like they would be around a significant other) around you?

3 comments:

  1. when i've been one of the guys i feel like they are just they usual selves, farting and whatnot. ha. gross.
    hooray for fun times, though!

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  2. I'm "one of the guys" until I get a drunken booty call at 2 AM. That's when I know I'm not "one of the guys" anymore.

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  3. I am TOTALLY "one of the guys," having been raised by two brothers and a military dad. I have more guy friends than girl friends. And my guy friends do swear, fart, burp, and generally act about 13 in front of me... but I wouldn't want it any other way :)

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